You are six years old today. I love you so very much. I love being your mom and I am so glad that YOU are my child. I really, really like who you are. You are a perfect blend of your parents. You have your dad’s brains, his love of learning. You have my love of people. I love watching how these loves fold out into your everyday.
I love how you play; fully engaged in the world as you see it. I love your wild and crazy adventurous spirit. I find your fearlessness inspiring, actually; like it simply does not occur to you that you can’t do something…so you just do it.
You are funny and cute and sweet and I am just so into you. Happy Birthday, my sweet child.
To our first unborn:
It has been four years…four years since we lost you- the day your older brother turned two…we celebrated his life while mourning yours. It was the first bad twist in an unfortunate plot.
Still today, hanging in Jonah’s closet is the “Big Brother” t-shirt we got for him when we found out about you. And then you left…as quickly as you came you were gone-but I couldn’t put away that shirt. It was too big for Jonah four years ago and now it is too small. But it still hangs there…because I just don’t have the heart to remove it- not yet.
I want you to know that though I have never held you in my arms, you are such a part of me. I miss you. I know where you are, though. And the One who does hold you is the same One who is holding me. I am confident of this: that I might have 60 more years here, apart from you. But I will have forever with you…and the dear ones who came after you. I cannot put into words how I long for that day.